They say that the death of a loved one, a divorce or moving house are some of those most stressful things a person can encounter. Illness, the loss of a job or standing on the scales and finding you have gained 3 kilos are also things that can tip a person over the edge. As a teenager, discovering a pimple on the morning of the big date was, to my teenage self, a catastrophe of monumental proportions.
As I matured, I became too busy to get stressed. I always meant to have a little breakdown, but never seemed to have the time.
I mastered the art of vacuuming with one hand while I ate a slice of toast and was still, remarkably, able to issue orders to the rest of the family to " get out of bed you lazy buggers " and plan my day at work. My mantra was that many hands make light work; the problem was that the many hands were all mine and the workload was often a hard slog.
When my daughters grew up and left home ( and my husband quickly followed suit - the leaving home bit - not the growing up bit ) , I experienced withdrawal symptoms. There was no need to rally the troops, spend hours ironing or to multi task. My octopus arms were now redundant and I found myself in a transition period: I had time to myself and a multitude of hours and minutes to fill with things that, to me, had no real purpose.
Over the years I stopped ironing and grew accustomed to the silence of the mornings that were once so hectic and filled with lists of " to do's " to tick off.
I became content in and with my own company. Instead of setting the table and cooking a meal, it was easier to shove a meal in the microwave and sit at my desk. Crumbs would fall onto the keyboard of my computer and bits of pizza learned to migrate into the dark crevices of the said keyboard.
As the mould started to grow , I reasoned that it was far simpler just to get a new keyboard rather than clean the one that I had. I always marvel at Redhead's computer keyboard - the keys don't feel sticky and the most used letters don't stay down once I have tapped them. Hmm, must be time to dump this one and buy a new one.
Life of late has taught me that I do not like change. I do not like being out of control of things.
Since the horror of the American election farce, I have thought of President Trump on a daily basis. He has spent 4 years vacuuming with one hand, eating and surviviving, planning the future and yelling out for someone, ANYONE to get the lazy bastards out of bed.
Yesterday, I had my computer monitor start to go bugger up. It currently sits inside a thing called " an office in a cupboard. " I love it. I can close the doors to my office and I do not need to be reminded of the penicillian drenched workspace or see the myriad of things I call treasures, rheems of paper recording corona deaths from the beginning of the year, the notes that I have written to myself or the box of computer leads that may come in handy one day.
not mine but you get the drift.
Redhead calls it " The MONSTER ". To me, it is a place I open each day and it is mine. My Sanctuary. It has been my special place for over 15 years.
As I say, the monitor is going bugger up. Apparently, in our hot Queensland heat, the poor thing cannot breathe in a cupboard and is slowly dying from Monster Cupboard Climate Change. It seems I need to let the climate challenged monitor get access to some air.
I promise to treat the new one with greater care and buy a fan so it can have a fighting chance at life.
I have ordered a new one. I then thought " I wonder if it is time to set up the computer in a different space? Get rid of the monster and sign up to the Paris Agreement and commit to a whole new strategy?
I ordered a new desk. It would need to be assembled. I then thought " if I have to get someone in to sort the desk, maybe I should move the furniture and have a whole RESET of things?
Before I knew where I was, a new computer monitor had turned in to a monster. I could see dollars flowing out; my entire home being re arranged to accommodate this sensitive screen and, by 2 am, I was suffering a panic attack of Larnach Castle proportions.
I got up this morning, cancelled the new desk, withdrew from the Climate Change Agreement for Sensitive Monitors and decided that my home is going to stay as I WANT IT.
What is happening in the world right now is not dissimilar to me and my computer monitor.
Rather than move all of my furniture, buy stuff I don't need, employ people to carry out tasks that I do not want, let's just all be thankful for what we have and let it stay as we want it to be.
After all, it is MY HOME.
No, my life is not perfect. Like coal powered electricity, there may be things that can be fixed.
But we do not have to bring down our entire house in order to install a new monitor and clean the keyboard.
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